the debate may be reaching a decision

So Gary and I have been in a big debate lately on to have any more children (assuming of course that is possible). I will definitely not go through any fertility treatments again, but if I am able to get pregnant on my own then should we or should we not have any more kids. There is a part of me that would like to give Brienna a sibling that is here full time. However there is another part of me that would always like her to be extra special and the "only" child every other weekend. She really is the most perfect baby, and I don't say that just because she is mine...because trust me I will be the first to admit how much a pain the ass my first child is!!! I remember how close my sister and I were and still are and so I would hate to rob her of that. I know I have no way of knowing that it would be a girl, but odds are stacked against Gary for any boys! So if we made the definitive descision to have another then I would want to start trying shortly after Brienna's 1st birthday to put them right around 2 years apart. Every month that goes by I think about what to do. Gary is on board either way, but I am the one who is not convinced. That was until we started talking about the holidays. Since both Rylee and Zach will have other families to attend to as they get older, Brienna could be left to fend for herself. I LOVE LOVE LOVE the holiday season, and a big part of that is the memories I have as a little kid sitting with my sister waiting by our door until we fell asleep to see if we could wait up for Santa. This year we don't have the older ones for Christmas, and of course that doesn't matter now because she won't remember a thing about her first Christmas, but what about in 5 years when it is Christmas and she has no siblings to put out cookies for Santa with, or no sibilings to wake up before daylight to say that Santa has come.

So I think as of now the decision is to have another baby. Of course I have 3 months to change my mind again, but I really think we are going to go for it. I know that Gary would really love to have a boy to carry on the Cundiff name but I also know that he would be just as happy if it were another little girl. We would of course have to make modifications to the house by turning the loft into another bedroom.

I am excited that we have finally reached the end of this debate. Wish us luck for the beginning of next year, although the "trying" part is the best of it all anyway ;) We certainly have no shortage of practice now!!